For My Midlife Children at Mothers Day

This one needs a separate blog.  Nothing is more important than survival and our children are its basic element.  

It seems just a moment ago that the little children in my life were growing up and soon were empty-nesting.   But their midlife is arriving and it is supposed to be easier:  this one love-note for my own children and children's groups I was blessed to help in cultural enrichment, arts and crafts, swim club, junior olympics,  BSA and GSA scouts,  and endless response in good moments and challenging ones - now with their own children and some grey hair.    I am still "yours in a heartbeat" to talk all night long if you like, but nice to see you do not need much, and when there is the moment, you seem to figure it out just fine!  So proud of you!

So just this:

Stay young.  

Growth to adulthood and decline to our passing are naturally  GRACEFUL  - with the human complications to keep it lively all along the timeline. You have no right to say 'old' - that is the business of your life drive and  whatever you call the source of all life. "Life is easy- pay attention"  someone told me and I passed that one thing on to my children and it still holds now.

Encourage your aging parents to stay young. 

They may even be amazed at what they can do - and feel they  want to do.  No one has the right to undermine the life of another.   I see that my aging is arriving almost 20 years later than it did for my parents - thanks to my parents, in many of its specifics - health, fitness, money, creativity, spirituality, and personal powers.  My thoughts are satisfying - I have not ruled the world, so far, but put my hand to all I could do and I have done some things really well, so far, and have the drive to do more.

See the miracles at later life - things forbidden by youth in its passions, and obligations and immaturitiesget golden later in life.  Since we are able to enjoy much better health, for many more years,  we can do more.   Each year more are living to be one hundred years old, and that fact makes us realize that retiring from things too soon is unwise and even silly.   I may be doing the best life ever, making the most money, and enjoying new things beyond my earlier dreams.      

Whether that be for a day or for many years to come, to never think old.   And that, when it is my time to pass, that I can co-operate to make a fine day of it, for all involved.  To leave with a blessing, not a curse, with loved ones near for a moment and then on again - love empowers.

 "Love is a Freedom Song" 

Easter Alleluja !

 like ours from those days and so charming!

 like ours from those days and so charming!

Best wishes for Easter / Spring 2017

O Radiant Dawn!     Splendor of Eternal Life!    Sun of Justice!     Shine on those who dwell in darkness and the shadow of Death !       - I love this one of the famous  "O Antiphons" - my favorite.

Easter falls on the first Sunday after the first Full Moon after the Vernal or Spring Equinox - to keep it in tune with nature and with Source of all nature, however you exprience it.  Spring is a miracle, but can be capricious and laughs, as it defies Man's attempts at structure - with a blizzard and a record high in the first thirty days of this year's season in America's Northeast.

I love my present life and I believe it is powerful to visit the past and bring some of the best of it to the present and share it round for the future - a treasure to leave my busy children to enjoy later, when they like.  And so this memory for you.

There had been grand life energies in my parents' large families that triumphed over wars, recession and even death.  And having endure they truly rejoiced at " the Radiant Dawn"; they enjoyed in those years: beauty , love, prosperity, property, good work, love marriage and children - they sang and danced through their days and helped the others and were helped as life calls us to do.  

 And , oh, the holidays!   It did not take much money to make it the best and done with youth and energy and hearts full of love and gratitude, they seemed always ambitious to share the good glow!   I grew up thinking everyone did the same and many did.  Hundreds of cards at Christmas and visits that took till New Years to complete.  Gifts and cozy warm things and fun in the snow and all tucked up safe and sound in work and love.

And Easter brought the same wonderful feelings, although , until I was older, I remember finding the Birth of a Baby easier to understand than Redemption and Resurrection -  my own shortfall did not daunt me - and I  just enjoyed the renewal of the seasons - Spring!     

Mornings smelled alive with new life and the wonderful New England soil - as soon as I could, I planted my first little garden and aunties and uncles smiled an told me lots about flowers and trees, so I would know a bit about what I was doing - they liked my many questions.  And later the fun of sketching and painting them - and making photos with my own first camera. Yes.

My Dad was musical and a tecchie - his record collection would be worth a small fortune today and some of it was saved, including the wonderful Easter music, still sung today - "Here comes Peter Cottontail!" , "Poor Floppy"  and others to make the days a happy dance.  

 There seemed to be Jellybeans and chickies and bunnies and Easter eggs everywhere!   The large sugar ones with hollow centers filled with dioramas to enoy thru a peep window at one end!   For me - already interested - there were Instructions for the crafts - coloring the eggs!  

Who would guess in in 1957 that that one day one fancy egg of mine would be viewed by a First Lady of the United States of America at the White House - but my happy heart on the subject is a fine thing to enjoy - a thing that no one can daunt.    I see the proud faces of my relatives, though I lived distant from them at the time and joyful phone calls had to be enough.  

It was the delight in doing up the simple little happy colored eggs that inspired and the Mommies who showed us how it was done.  Boiled and colored and served to many guests with the fancy beets and horseradish sauce that won over the flatness of egg and brought bright pink to the table, with the Easter ham, and irish bread and Polish borscht for spring with the special spring sausage!  The kitchen was boiled to shining before, during and after - and even Mother's new range was pink with pushbuttons!  

Then, since it was all about Jesus somehow - and very sad, but then happy again - we would take some of the food in a basket to church for the Priests' blessings, so that all from the kitchen would be good and blessed, and always with new happiness, too!  

And Spring meant putting the winter things away - all the fine and not so fine would be done till after Autumn when the weather chilled again.   For now it was Spring and joyfully running about with Mother and friends for the gay spring things for home and wardrobe - plenty of the light wools  often in lilac - including the lilac blossom-clustered hats that were popular at the time.  We love to look our best and win the respect of the women and the  affections charming our men - then and now!

Such happy bustle and  prayer at end of day - thanking God for the good grace!  Odd -  somehow my own love and work does not feel the same as those endless glowing days as a child in that world. And  yet,  I know I did similarly with  our own son and daughter later on with extra to spare for all the other children near us, so grateful to have that example to pass on.  They are married and I hope they will want to make their own version of it all to share with children of their own, but if not, at least they have that good in them from us.

Those bunnies!   Chocolate ones in pretty baskets woven and full of fun green grass and cellophane - or bunny cakes or the wonderful huggy ones, small and huge later on for fun!  But most of all , one year there were real bunnies, as we scampered at our parents' call one Easter morning to enjoy the living room egg hunt before church - out from behind Dad's lounge chair they came, to make us catch our breath - the thrill!   "Lippety, lippety !   lippety, lippety !"  two tiny marvels  to pet and feed and love.   Soon we had proper  lessons in their care and Dad built a hutch in the back yard for them and finally trained them to enjoy the back yard and then on their own in our wooded yard with brook nearby.  

And someone's baby bunnies showed up the next year!  I share the story to share pure pleasure and inspiration. All these years later, I remember and it feeds me - a life thing!   Not only our own family circle but Easter at the homes of friends and family living distant dance again in my mind - one did the ancient egg crafting with the waxes and dyes.  Another did up an Easter Egg Tree, and another lived in the garden feeding the lilacs and planting for the warm months to come.   And instead of a teddy bear, a musical stuffed lamb was mine - of real sheeps wool - I was sad to outgrow him but at that point someone "disappeared" him and yet I guessed it was time.  Growing up is fun and we must not be babies. 

Especially not at Easter !  
The Church music and Handel's Halleluja Chorus or Leonard Cohen's  -  the world sings - the air sings with rains and breezes and our hearts sing, every time we're not looking , especially!  

Winter and War may have their way - but I am Spring and I win!  

May it be, for you and yours always.
If you would like to share a thing here, please feel welcome.   

Happy Easter!


Banner: Occupant Safety and Escape Technology -

The President just said,   "We will make America safe again" ...we can do better than that and nearly now....when I mentioned it at FaceBook someone asked me to explain....all it takes is one and here it is:

" thank you so much for asking!  
To make my point, it's a story but not long or boring.

 My Mother Albina Filanowski Backiel Smith Duffy loved my Father Richard Charles Smith very much - their marriage was from heaven and three fine children later, and me eldest,  His Army Air Corps days behind him he was helping with early NASA coated fabrics projects at the DuPont plant his dad helped build.  Friends and neighbors were aeronautic engineers etcc...pioneers in things and noted ones.   Post war excitement about life in a free world, in peacetime, included designs for occupant safety and escape for planes and tall buildings!

This was maybe 1954.

I was a little girl and attracted to their table because of their excited talk of the pods for easy escape in case of disaster and other methods to make planes and skyscrapers NOT deathtraps.

They pulled me up on their laps and showed me, since I was so interested.   "Don't worry, littlegirl! " they said, "by the time you are grown up , it will be safe for you all!"
" Wow! "...not really understanding, I was still impressed, and satisfied, I  jumped down and skipped away.
Months later, I wondered to my Mother what had become of the neat Planes project. 

SHHHHH!!! she warned. NEVER bring it up to your Father - they tried and it did not go well and they were humiliated and said to be too far ahead of themselves, and now they are upset.

Later I learned that the conscensus was this: the idea was great - responsive to what SHOULD have been an obvious safety need.  But NOT practical - tech was not ready and what COULD be done was much too expensive to be used effectively. The entire idea was squelched , EXCEPT for ejection seats for SOME jet pilots.

I was good and never brought it up again, as Mother asked, and worked to forget it , in fact -  with success.

Then it was NINELEVEN - that evening and living near Ground Zero in NYC, I saw the protective planes guarding the night , flying low was around 7pm and not too dark.   I felt like a grateful child protected by parents for a moment and my love of country filled my heart.

I walked back indoors to begin my supper, alone in my bungalow, when without warning, overwhelmed:
 my head snapped back and my legs caved in beneath me and I grabbed the kitchen counter, so as not to fall.
MEMORY of the sunny kitchen table meeting about safety escape returned , all at once!   And instantly the realization: NO ONE NEEDED TO DIE TODAY!  

There could have been fast escape and no one dead...or nearly was too much!

A SECOND HORROR MOMENT there was for me that evening.

If I could have cried , I would have, but tears would not come!   To have that Occupant Safety and Escape Technology memory sweep over me like a tsunami after FORTY YEARS left me Stunned.

It was a wild day for people, and  my rosary was nearby . I prayed for all of us and was silent....slept.

The next day or soon after - I acted on that memory and understanding.

I told my neigbor chat friend - she looked at me.  " I have no idea what you are talking about, but I am with you."
NEXT: The Sikorsky team that built the Helicopter and employed important friends and neighbors and sometimes, my DAD became United Technology.

So, next, I told one of their former resource librarians, now at our library, a few blocks away - and very smart.

I went to her and told her my memory and  was well-received.  In the following days others joined the chat and they said, almost laughing ,  the classic  " you go..." to the United Technologies Admin office 15 minutes away , in Hartford CT the state Capitol.

So I did...huge flags were everywhere, and the lame walked on the passions generated on that day.  I was one of them - injured and still disabled - truly lame.   My late husband would say of me "She walks on water" to make me smile and empower me in the touchy moment.  I felt him with me then.

I got to the lobby and was told to "go right up" - I looked at the receptionist in disbelief, UT is big and one respects - Did someone call ahead, to have me so easily received?    The receptionist  reassured me and said no one had called ahead  about me.....they were just that nice and ready to talk.

But at that point  appeared the phantasmagoric feeling ....all alone in the middle of a vastness and suddenly realized they'd think me mad - and went home to collect better data and then return.    Still the nice reception encouraged, so I DID go home and get busy finding better data.

BETTER DATA - it's so evil!

Squelching and burying the Occupant Safety and Escape Technology Innovations back in the 50s- 60s, was so well done, that , later, in the 70s and later,  when it COULD have been done, for some reason, no one would DARE bring it up!   A very unpopular banner. Even though it made the life/death difference for many thousands,  it was avoided.

I stayed online and kept searching for the right path for this.  I found and told my story to one of the groups of those who lost loved ones on Nineleven - they were fit to be tied - heartbroken and outraged.  They already KNEW and were upset at what they got when THEY tried to ACT on the knowledge.

Apparently, I was not the only one who knew of this issue - a true REMEDY for what had been hopeless.   The grieving Nineleven families  found out about it, too and went to leaders to get some action, but were rebuffed, refused, rejected and just plain stonewalled - it was WAR and they did not wish to pick up an issue that was bound to show how remiss 'certain organizations" and their heads,  had been.  

STILL I kept at it.

Made webpages and talked to people like M.I.T. for design ideas / options for the actual achievement -  and they were AWFUL....wiseguy remarks and more, but many who KNEW and could be respected SUPPORTED my passion for approaching leaders , at a better timing. 

The result was a concensus to WAIT  and then find the leaders and  say: "Okay , first the ideas were ahead of their time and squelched. Then it was 1976 and it could have been a jewel in the American Bicentennial crown , but NO.  It did not happen.  Then it was a recession and everyone was saying NO to everything.  

But  then it was too late - it was Nineleven and with no effective, safe, tech escape options, LOTS of people died . OUR people.  And nobody needed to die!

"So whattabout NOW? !" 

Many of the genius innovations upgrades are NOT even genius anymore....but safe, obtainable, and affordable to do and yet they are not done.



There are so many different ways to do it easily and safely....and affordably, that I will not describe them here...but the escape cars in the skyscrapers could be placed  everywhere in a few years...and it would work!

NO one would be hurt and in fact there might be an end to such bombings since, if safe fast egress was 'at the ready' - there would be NO MOTIVE for bombings, since the people would not be hurt, but safely out and to ground in five minutes flat.

IN the planes it's fancier tech,  but escape cabins with GPS, food and water and first aid could detach from a threatened plane and let the passengers escape IN the cabins, to land or sea , till help arrived.  It would also make bulwarks in the planes, or airships, as they were called at first.

It never leaves me alone, due to my childhood experience and conscience and then the dramatic way it found me at nineleven.  

Thousands have needlessly died, billions will be saved when this upgrade finally happens.  

I was a den mother, wife of honored coroporate, employee of honored firms and redcross in wars....I am not an airhead.  

I was head of the class in schools and passed another course top marks again just a few months ago. RESPECT ME.

AND PRAY  that one day, this idea touches the angels the right way, breaks thru to mankind and finally gets DONE


Purpose - Splendid Torch - G.B.Shaw


January Capricornian Earth tones - bookmark on canvas in fixed water media - ellefagan'13  (price on request)

January Capricornian Earth tones - bookmark on canvas in fixed water media - ellefagan'13  (price on request)

If we are clamoring to make America Great Again , we need to look, first, in the mirror, and not always rant at the government or family or other loved ones on the topic.  It is so wonderful to simply realize that there is, quite likely, one small thing each of us can actually DO to be worthy of our citizenship in a government of, for, and by the people ( i.e., us - you and I)  The famous G.B. Shaw wrote this one and its lines are true and helpful to beat "the Januaries". 

The first time these words [by G.B.Shaw] were printed was in an article entitled 'Art and Public Money', published in the Sussex Daily News (7 March 1907).   *

Also named  "A Splendid Torch"  or, "Purpose" -  this is A New Years Inspiration for everyone!  A vitamin of a sort,  from George Bernard Shaw, one of my least favorite persons, but most favorite storytellers.  It is reprinted everywhere under several titles.   I hope you enjoy the easy read!  Elle


This is the true joy in life,

the being used for a purpose

recognized by yourself as a mighty one;

the being a force of nature

instead of a feverish, selfish little clod of

ailments and grievances

complaining that the world will not

devote itself to making you happy.

I am of the opinion that

my life belongs

to the whole community,

and as long as I live

it is my privilege

to do for it whatever I can.

I want to be thoroughly used up when I die,

for the harder I work the more I live.

I rejoice in life for its own sake.

Life is no “brief candle” for me.

It is a sort of splendid torch

which I have got hold of

for the moment,

and I want to

make it burn as brightly as possible

before handing it on to future generations.




** p.s. thank you to Prof. Martin who found the exact source for this famous writing at

Gustavo A. Rodríguez Martín

Dpto. de Filología Inglesa
Fac. de Filosofía y Letras
Universidad de Extremadura
Campus Universitario, s/n
Cáceres, 10003 - ESPAÑA



The Bernard Shaw Quotations Page


George Bernard Shaw (GBS) Youtube Channel

Posted in ArtInspirational storyspiritwritingGeorge Bernard Shaw


tagged with writingStorytrue storyFamous Writerinspirational storyPurposeElle Smith Fagan










Ekphrasis Prize Poem "In the Woods"

"Ekphrasis" - a segment of the Art-stravaganza of Open Studio Hartford, extols images from its group show in song and dance and poetry. This year - it's eleventh - I am honored to say that Poetess Susan Mardinly made the poem "In the Woods" about my painting of the same namehere. Comment Welcome. Thank you at Thanksgiving to Susan and her beautiful verse!  


In the Woods

Light shines upon the forest stream,

facets dancing upon rocks and pebbles,

singing to us, knowing we also are fashioned of light,

magnetic, electric, fused, 

particles, forms, waves, 

of dreams, of unperceived matter,

of fundamental knowing,

but always drawn light unto light.


Prisms of cumulus rainbows, 

flashing through the eye of winter snow,

reflecting upon limbs and branches,

illuminating watery paths above and below,

a recipe made of hydrogen and oxygen,

metamorphosis beyond human ken,

in sound streaming, in heat dancing, 

or scattering in luminescent flow.


Far beyond reason or logic,

inspired by these miracles,

we become trained to see with other eyes: 

smaller worlds that dwell enlightened:

tree roots wriggling in shimmering growth,

caravans of ants as they scurry to bring food,

flowers in unencumbered rest far beneath the sparkle,

new life about to emerge from joyful winter dens.


Taking this wild journey in the woods,

shimmering insight burns away dross

radiant within the light that imbibes us:

in optical duality, in mirrors upon mirrors 

our inner blaze transforming,

listening to the speed of creations’ flashes,

to the scent of fire’s kindle, the taste of luminous fruit,

of healing love that light sustains.  


copyright © 2016 susanj mardinly 


Dies Irae - Presidential Election Day Nov 8, 2016

Politics has NOTHING to do with good government and yet we take it that way every time for the esprit - our lives and the lives of our children are at stake and we "mostly show up and make noise".   It's such a poor show that if we fail, it will most likey be about audience disinterest.    We are government of, for and by the people - for good and ill.   We can bring a government to life and we can kill.     This particular election has been a "first" for me - FEARful.  After the way it has evolved, I think you should "vote for Elle" as they said in Legally Blonde 2.   THIS Elle, though.   


Why vote for ELLE SMITH FAGAN  -  she is America.

Born of parents with classic, romantic and sociologically key backgrounds, her upbringing was trained for something - the best of character and priniciple and she soared and prospered.  She was red cross during VietNam and pioneer and charter member and startup crew for most of the  headliners of the seventies.  Some classified things.  Then came death and the recession and she suffered brutally, while saving her children and a few others in response works. She understands and got her self to war and to the homelessshelters helping from her strong Red Cross experience  AND to the White House with her Artisanal Jewelled egg from her strong Arts background and education....and the underlying passion for America and Compassion/Intellect in balance carried her in fine health to this day. So vote for Elle is not so far off an idea.

Her platform?   Clean and Green - honesty and disclosure. Thinking out of the box to optimize the box.   Breakthroughs she would win, in a few basics that should have won thru a long time ago in the following areas just to start:

WORLD PEACE - Wars can be reduced and even eliminated by strengthening the power of negotiations and agreements.  And we won't do it.    KEVLAR and other top equipment for ALL our soldiers under fire.  The number of casualties can be greatly reduced by better safety provisions for our fighters;  I think it a monstrous thing that our heroes are NOT equipped by the military for lifesaving needs. Instead, they must buy their own bulletproofing!  How  Wildly wrong of us!  And, even then,  much of what is offered them is sub-standard - not really topstuff.  They are laying their lives on the line for us and we fail them!   We will pay - ARE paying - whether we know it or not.  

TECHNOLOGICAL LIFESAVING - seatbelts on trains and busses and safe paths and train tracks and my top banner?  Occupant Safety and Escape tech:   Nineleven did not need to happen - we bought it.  If intelligence could not prevent it, responsible Occupant Safety and Escape Technology would have done two things:   ONE:  it would have allowed for safe escape and almost zero loss of innocent life.   It was promised over 50 years ago and easy tech today.  But Architecture and Aeronautics squelch the topic and bribe media and government to leave them alone on the subject !   And, though thousands die needlessly, you won't see even a story about it on tv or in the papers.   TWO:  with the safe egress of the peopel guaranteed, the terrorists would have NOT been interested in them as a target - why? No one would be hurt, and so no motive.    The mechanics are easy today and affordable and able to be installed in existing structures.

MONEY -  Our issues can be resolved and our national debt honestly reduced to zero or near so, like any honest production.  And we won't do it.  HOW?  A simple list that WORKS for other nations and would work for us easily if we were not determined to be blockheads on the subject:  

1. OWN the casinos - adds a lot of money and subtracts a lot of crime in that realm 

2.  All prisoners in our jails and prisons EARN their keep and a bit to put by - that makes the prison system self-supporting and NOT a tax burden or addition to the national debt; it keeps the prisoners growing in work ethic character and not crime-ethic ways; it allows us to imprison as fully as we should instead of letting them loose to commit more crime and learn nothing to help them become honest citizens.  Do not tell me it cannot be done. It is easier than ever.  

3. Call in our debts - government in our country thinks it is a country club and the suggestion that people pay us what they owe strikes them as bizarre, when it is a basic to decency , honesty and NOTfraud.    

4. WINNING by EARNING the right to become American:  I am not sure of this one, but it at least shows thought:  to cut down on the influx of aliens, allow the green cards if they subscribe to becoming American with a subscription fee, payable from earnings. They must not be unemployed.  The prison concept updates helps here since, if prisoners must work and earn while in prison and the prisons are self-supporting, then we can incarcerate vagrants / unemployed illegals and let them earn it, if they want it here.  Most of us had to EARN the good things we enjoy and yet these people just pile in and bully everyone and we are supposed to let them do this? no.  The prison idea works because the drug and crime re: illegals are minimized and good character growth improved within prison walls.   Of course one would not imprison these with hardened felons.

REGAINING LOST HUMANITY IN EVERYDAY LIFE IN AMERICA -  we have been amazing in our response to the population explosion, and two-career households - provided thousands of paths to adequately provide goods and services for all these people!     But we really lost it at first and it still shows.  So let's take a breath and center a bit and put on a more civilized show now:    the little things that mean a LOT :  Simply saying "children" instead of "kids" so much would give people what they say they want.    Wearing a suit at work time, a gown at the evening event and recreation wear and casual wear more and much less overuse of  jeans.   Small things like that make a big difference in the human midset.    Regaining balance and putting the sex and violence back in perspective with the whole of human experience in every place in society:   media, like our tv and film and literature and music and schools and churches and social scenarios.     We can also do a few things that empower our compassionate response  and minimize costs and margin for error and increase the effectiveness of the many helping groups.


WE CAN FIX things because of our wonderful empowering and adaptable Constitution.  Still, We buy our issues with both hands and then expect respect when we merely react to them like hysterics and refuse to simply "set it back to rights" .

We need to continue in equal rights on the basis of any criteria, including age and we will be doing it right:  we  lean on youthful members of society too  hard because at least nature makes them see life as easily do-able, though they lack the sense of experience and care, and  wisdom and right-minded use of power that only comes with age.  We need to mix it up better and lovingly and it gets better.   NO entitlement or bullying - that is not rights - that is "might makes right" illegal. One bully is the same as another.

Our nation, The United States of America, was and is the best every dreamt of, bled for and won!   We have no right to neglect her to death!   Vote for Elle and at least that much will be better.



Squarespace Lady

"We are sorry, there is no such site."

Displayed when I asked for MY arts site of fourteen years -  IN the following days, more and more website functionality issues tumbled onto my desk,  with my formerly-beloved web host,   The Aplus super Customer service had been grand in helping set up, upgrade and fix issues,  and get right back to work for years. 

 NOT THIS TIME - not only were there repeated issues with Aplus, that worsened -  the customer service people became malicious.   It became a bad dream for me with Aplus hosting and that resulted in a complete site crash at end 2014. 

What happened: The checkbook company,  Deluxe For Business, or DFB,  had bought out Aplus, and I thought that might be grand!  Their ownership should not have upset my pages.  But it did, very much!   Site visitors dropped from really  nice, for a small private site, to almost zero.  Normally, even while disabled, nice extra Holiday sales would help make a Happy Holiday to share.  NOT this year!   

Time for me to leave them.  Things were disintegrating.  They keep archives of websites in case of crashes or power-outs, but they would NOT give me a copy of my site, and a nice goodbye,  so I had to go to my FTP pathway and haul ten years of files from their files to my desktop - which fried the computer - a trusty iMac that had two more years of NORMAL use to it.  

Worse:  Aplus' people also simply cut me off from MY domain name <> and used it for their ads!   I was able to get the law at them immediately .  They stopped exploiting my domain name.  But they would NOT transfer it back to my domain name store, so I could use it at the new web host's .  That was December 2014.  Domain names renew each year at the same time as the date they were first purchased.   And since <> would renew again in February, I watched it at the domain name company and bought it back at renewal time with a forwarding command to the new domain I had by then.  Yikes!  

The old pages would have to be redone and updated, anyway, or at least transferred manually to the new site.  And the COST to me in equipment, stress and missed holiday sales was NO joke.  My old attorney had retired and the new one needed a larger retainer than I could afford.  Cry if you need to. Then, Pray and get to work.

Still technically disabled, but "fine" now, that website <> had contributed to my survival daily and was key to regaining financialy "fine" as well.   So  I ran to see if I could find a DECENT new web host.    I still think it was an angel - suddenly, I"just found"  them - "Squarespace",  a fine and popular company, with , actually much more to offer for my needs, and for nice decent money.  I Googled them and the stories about Squarespace were encouraging.   Anddddd they are arts-friendly and so, I thought,  maybe this find was going to bea left-handed blessing - to cheer my Christmas.

But Winter Holiday 2014, I spent  pre-Christmas sale time, crying, working to fix the issues, settling and doing up the new site... often missing the rapport of those years when I'd chat with Ivan Vachovsky, Aplus' genius entrepreneur, and the site folk, for one thing or another and it always had gone so nicely - and for years- so I was hurt to lose them.   NOT a good Christmas!

I used a small immediate lawsuit win/chargeback - from Aplus,  to buy the Squarespace site, at the end of November 2014 . Rocking from the upsetting farewell from my old world, it was now 2015, and I had a new world online to get to know.   And, with Aplus hurting my domain name <>, my part of cyberspace would be injured - maybe for good.  I had to use my name in full <> for the new site. 

I smiled.  I am like John Hancock, on the Declaration of Independence,  now with a huge big name....<ELLESMITHFAGAN.COM>.   I reacted: "ok, demons from hell, if you hated <> you may have <> and like it.     So there!   I smiled a little bit for the first time in weeks. 

Still, it would have been nicer to skip the issues.  To stay out of trouble in the first place is better than rescue in the second place.

It is two Christmas Seasons coming now and I am thrilled with Squarespace and my life is normal again. A few months ago , I even did my first big upgrade with them.  Their staff is ALL English-speaking and maybe that is a help in tech issues galore with a nice content-rich  site like mine. Andddd....their templates save more time than I can believe. Super!     I have no perception of the online/offline issues - all my famly are tech-comfy.  I did my first data things in 1969.

I am fine and hope you will enjoy your visits to my  wonderful Squarespace site as much as I enjoy making them for you!

Hallowe'en Stories of a Sort

Do not let the cheery pumpkins fool you - I have scary stories to share at Halloween at this true stories blog.  But should they be shared at all?  Grownup scary stories are not pretty. 

Mayborn, my life has been a blessing, and very normal;  these stories only a fraction of my generally happy life.   More -  these stories  enjoyed happy endings,  but I certainly do have my moments - and then I realize most folks do.

  Life is not "Trick or Treat" but Trick AND Treat ! 

A list of my scary stories - details on request

Read More

Golden Autumn !

I think I am lucky - raised well with "the good lights" and a family who passed on their love of nature and life in all forms - here it is Autumn and the time of Harvest and taking stock, and being sure that all is set safely till Spring.   Winter in Connecticut can be grand and a fairy treat,  sparkling with cold or a long dreary trek, but Autumn if done well,  makes all the difference. 

Read More

Art With Heart

  • ART WITH HEART at Elle Fagan Art  makes   OUTRIGHT DONATIONS OF ARTWORK FOR YOUR FUNDRAISER, CHARITY OR CAUSE.  I am lifelong arts, but also used to do response and compassionate and pioneer work and now, I donate art outright for full or part benefit.

  • Art With Heartdoes happy 50/50s with charitable events for top images, for a good cause - Contact for details.

  • Art With Hearthelps you to own the painting you want here, AND help your favorite cause, as well.

Read More

October is Breast Cancer Awareness Month -

Today the testing is easy and liberally covered by insurances and almost required, because it saves lives, and that might have included mine in 2009 - but did NOT.  And my happiness and insights made it necessary for me get active about helping with Awareness every October and I love it!  It's an honor to share the good news we enjoy toay - IF.....

Read More

Visions happen

No one believes me, and when they do, they never approve - they feel uncomfortable and sometimes, so do I, but it is time to share the memory anyway.    

Mind's eye - with happy parents and romantic ones, and seven Irish Uncles on Dad's side, I was bound to be a bit fey.  NOT always happily as when I'd find "The Merry Widow Waltz" strangely appealing - my Father said " you peeked" - looking into your own future.  The idea that I would probably be a widow if statistics held, but not necessarily so unhappy....things like that make it difficult to share sometimes.

Read More

September is Aneurysm Awareness Month!

Summer 2016 marked the 35th anniversary of the year that Aneurysm issues hit home and changed our lives forever!   When suddenly widowed to the "Time Bomb In the Brain",  there was not much we could have done to prevent it.  NOTTANYMORE!  Share the message to any you know who may be at risk for it: Get the Tests!  They save lives.....and enjoy this post and comment as you like - find me as needed - I am here for this one.....elle.

Read More

My Nineleven Story 8:46 a.m. EST

 More than 5,000 dead.
"The September 11 attacks killed 2,996 people and injured more than 6,000 others. ...   Almost another 2500 have died, as of end 2013,  from related toxins on that day, including a dozen miscarriages of unborn.   Wikipedia     I cannot find an accurate tally of ANIMALS who died at WTC or later from toxic exposure diseases.    But this story about the few surviving  Search and Rescue Dogs there for days is helpful.

Read More

2016 month-by-month news!


Pequot Library in Southport, Connecticut, USA  - historic site and working library for over a century presented it's 19th Annual Art Show! Honored to have two of my paintings on display there this year as in years before - companion fundraising auction and sales to fundraise to keep the Library's rose quartz outside and sofa-ed fireplaces inside, sharing a world-class yet nice, small collection of reading and historical materials and up-to-date technology.

Read More