Christmas Wedding

After the ceremoney at St.Anthony Fairfield CT - at Frederick's Reception also in Fairfield, CT 12-17-66

December 17th 1966 - years of longing, and work and learning and more work and finding the moment of love forever born and winning through to this day!

At least for our children, long ago grown and living distantly with fine work and loves of their own I will share this "part one" of THE story of how we met and married.  It was all so grand to us, and a gift of empowering love is their birthright!  

But that's another story. More will come.

Our Christmas wedding turned out to be the Army's idea, and a lovely one!  We were a 'love at first sight" pair - the happy result of long dreams and preparation and long prayed-for. We'd dated for nearly two years and we found it easy to talk about everything:  there were no impediments to a bright future together.  As often happens, once engaged,  the planned date of 1969 , worked perfectly at first - his end of service sync-ed with  my graduation from college - yes!    But "Plan A" had to be dropped due to illness and financial setbacks to some of the top players in our lives - not a worry! The wedding date was accelerated to December 17th, 1966 at Christmas leave.  Even better! This meant we could be together as Commissioned Officer and Officer's wife and I could help Red Cross.  Of course, we were in a time of changes for us - some of which were not of our making and not of our desiring. But overall, such things were not a major obstacle. We were fine and families and legalities were pleased with us -  happy.

I look back and think, "Gosh, we were brave!"   We all had fine schools and fine studies and yet we were young, untried, new at adult life in any form, and that day, soon all off to war, and war is death!     I remember the intense joy at our love and anguish for his survival in VietNam - competing for my emotions, love won that day.

We grew up on John Wayne patriotism and were sickened and undermined by the unpopularity of this war.  But, just for now, even death had only limited powers in the face of our love!  We knew we'd come "Shining through" and we did.  War presented  opportunities to serve one another AND our country and community and family, too.

 In addition to the war to threaten this time of love's commitments, Mother and Dad were dealing with health and money issues , but they were the best, and so, cooking up a wedding helped everything !  

This wedding  project development was doing profoundly well at doing good in all ways.

In Fairfield, all  brides were in heaven !   If you grew up there, for a golden time you owned the town!   A blessed girlhood was paying off with a very happy start into adulthood!  Wedding social and fashion and mores abounded! l Rules - there were rules and one could experience lots of desireable extras if one bothered to seek and follow them.

 Young marriage is not really recommended, but we were were fine for it and it worked and lasted happily and successfully.  There was plenty of excitement to whittle the few pounds off for a very classy look for the pictures!   Happy cheat!   Money, reception, gifts, engraved invitations, flowers, and the people we loved!    Wardrobe?   My beloved "Nanna" a friend of the family was a designer and we had serious fun with it and the shop keepers in the NYC garment district treated us like visiting royalty one afternoon, shopping for the wedding gown fabrics.

We made a nice picture in our wedding things - My double-brocaded satin and faux white mink Christmas wedding gown and his  elegant  USACE Officers Uniform: oh yes!  It was going to be nice.

The day:   Everyone had  gone on to the church but the bride hung back for the classic "moment" on the threshold of her Father's house and stepping out over it to adulthood and  new life,  with a prayer for continued love for God and Man - especially one man!  Her Man!  The noise of war tried to crowd out the sweetness of the day and I recall ,saying silently to the heavens, " OHHHH NO YOU DON"T - not this day!  This day is not yours - it is our day."    

Snapped out of my reverie by a horn blast from my "carriage" ,  they promised to be going on to the church without me, if I did not come along as Dad did, to escort to me to Godfather Uncle Bill's long white car,   laughing that I'd miss my own wedding!   "Here comes the Bride!" , they called, laughing merrily,  then turned solemn,  as we approached the Church. The lovely vigil snowfall I'd hoped for had created the pretty scene and cleared,  and now it was the cool and crisp but sunny day!  Everything with the sparkling white coverlet and me afraid to own up to my own delight in it.

As we entered, it was clear that the arrangements  were being carried out really well: work was well done: all was ready and lovely, especially the hearts!  There for me was the church I helped fundraise for, festooned with flowers and ribbons all along my path;  and the people filled the pews.  There was my bridal party on ahead of me: maid of honor/cousin Betty; a sister of the groom, Mary; a best friend, my sister  junior bridesmaid in her first gown, Lorraine,  and  my boss' six-year-old,  our flower girl little Sandy.  
Waiting at the altar the groomsmen were a handome show,  in the classic line of duty: groom's brother the Best man, John Francis, in Naval Uniform, who almost took over the wedding when his Navy ship was delayed in docking and he had to make a wild dash racing down the aisle,to take his place on time;  next, in Morning coat, my brother, Rick, on his way to a green beret then red;  then Denny, a fellow officer from the groom's OCS ;  and for my kid sister, my groom's kid brother Terry !  Some guys!  I can be proud of them all to this day, thank goodness!

 My Father, almost ashen with solemnity, escorted me down the aisle and passed my hand to my soulmate's keeping, so handsome in his newly-commissioned USACE officer's uniform - lucky me  !  

Our priest at the service was a personal friend to my father-in-law, who'd studied for the priesthood himself, early on, then turned to accounting and law and many babies.  The vows:  It was time.  And we were ready and we were fine.  The event itself seemed to go too quickly, after all that preparation!

 But with rings and a kiss and a blessing and a song, and a full church giving a cheer, we were one! 

The Reception at THE place for it that year was dizzy, with two hundred in attendance,  but went very well, and soon we were at the Bridal Suite at the Hotel Americana in New York for the wedding night, and plane to Bermuda  in the morning!   We were just so happy to be "US" , we  enjoyed the beauties of the "eye- lahnd" and our time alone so lovely!   And when the Blizzard of '66 gave us an entire extra week at the Airline's expense - oh yes -  grand fun to be stranded on an island with one's one true love! What better start  - thank you, saints and angels!

Even a blizzard will clear  after a week, but homecoming would now be on New Years Eve and more fun, and then off to Fort Knox a few days later.  But that's another story.  

My wish for my newlywed children ?  Quote from a top pop film at the time:  "Gidget" - her Grandmother in the movie points to the family motto:  "Don't say that Love has been a disappointment to you ~  Don't you be a disappointment to Love ! " 

...easy, once you get the idea  

e.

The Twelve Days of Christmas Decoded

An Underground Catechism ~

You're all familiar with the Christmas song, "The Twelve Days of Christmas" I think. To most it's a delightful nonsense rhyme set to music. But it had a quite serious purpose when it was written. It is a good deal more than just a repetitious melody with pretty phrases and a list of unique gifts. 

Catholics in England during the period 1558 to 1829, when Parliament finally emancipated Catholics in England, were prohibited from ANY practice of their faith by law - private OR public. It was a crime to BE a Catholic.  "The Twelve Days of Christmas" was written in England as one of the "catechism songs" to help young Catholics learn the tenets of their faith.  It was used as a memory aid, when to be caught with anything "in writing",  indicating adherence to the Catholic faith, could be risking one's very life!  Church history includes many British Catholic martyrs for the faith during this era. 

The song's gifts are hidden meanings to the teachings of the faith. The "true love" mentioned in the song doesn't refer to an earthly suitor, it refers to God Himself. The "me" who receives the presents refers to every baptized person. 

"On the First day of Christmas, my true love gave to me, A Partridge in a Pear Tree"                 The partridge in a pear tree is Jesus Christ, the Son of God. In the song, Christ is symbolically presented as a mother partridge which feigns injury (since he rose from the dead) to decoy predators from her helpless nestlings, much in memory of the expression of Christ's sadness over the fate of Jerusalem: "Jerusalem! Jerusalem! How often would I have sheltered thee under my wings, as a hen does her chicks, but thou wouldst not have it so."     This opening symbolic reference  bewails the current persecution, and the desire to protect the faithful and tutor the "nestlings" - christian children.

The other symbols mean the following: 

2 Turtle Doves = The Old and New Testaments 

3 French Hens = Faith, Hope and Charity, the Theological Virtues 

4 Calling Birds = the Four Gospels and/or the Four Evangelists 

5 Golden Rings = The First Five Books of the Old Testament, the "Pentateuch", 

6 Geese A-laying = the six days of creation 

7 Swans A-swimming = the seven gifts of the Holy Spirit, the seven sacraments 

8 Maids A-milking = the eight beatitudes 

9 Ladies Dancing = the nine Fruits of the Holy Spirit 

10 Lords A-leaping = the ten commandments 

11 Pipers Piping = the eleven faithful apostles 

12 Drummers Drumming = the twelve points of doctrine in the Apostle's Creed in P.S. below. 

-Paraphrased from -Fr. Hal Stockert 12/17/95 ( his version had to be cleaned up because his report of the persecutions  digressed into boyish delight in describing methods of torture....not really appropriate or inspiring. But no other changes made.) 

P.S. It has come to our attention that this tale is made up of both fact and fiction. But may it be  that this tale give  courage, and determination to use any creative means at one's disposal to keep one's faith alive.    Original resource: Copyright © 1987-2003 Catholic Information Network (CIN) - Updated: 12-26-03 

P.S.  RE: On the twelfth day of Christmas, my True Love gave to me, twelve drummers drumming.

The twelve drummers represent the twelve precepts of the Faith presented in the Apostle's Creed. The translation of the Creed given in the Catechism is given below.

1. I believe in God, the father almighty, Creator of heaven and earth.
2. I believe in Jesus Christ, his only Son, our Lord.  
3. Who was conceived by the power of the Holy Spirit and born of the Virgin Mary 
4. suffered under Pontius Pilate, was crucified, died and was buried. 
5. He descended into hell.
6. On the third day he rose again from the dead
7. He ascended into heaven and is seated at the right hand of the Father.  
8. He will come again to judge the living and the dead. 
9. I believe in the Holy Spirit, the holy Catholic Church, the communion of saints
10. the forgiveness of sins
11. the resurrection of the body, and 
12. life everlasting. Amen.

First fruits for 2017 - Living Past 100 and Loving It!

Happy New Year!    And MANY MANY more are likely to be yours according to reliable media. Every year more people live to be over one hundred years old and more-or-less lucid and enjoying quality days!     In 2014, there were 72,197 Americans aged 100 or older, and this was up from fifty thousand plus, in 2000.     Click and Read the resourced article from Smithsonian to pursue this thread.

Our lifestyles, healthcare, clean living and fitness - they work!  Family counselling makes the length of days a fine journey!

This is the best New Year's gift I can give the world.   When you begin your day, think 100+ and see how it makes you look at people differently, starting with the one in your morning mirror.   Insights as we outsight,  no?

More and more of us "upper midlife folk" are jogging, dancing, working and earning , marrying and remarrying and enjoying intimacy till true old age says otherwise.  

Grandparents are caring for grandchildren so that their children can concentrate on school or work goals - or , in the case of single parents, they are happy babysitters,  so they can date and find the new soulmate on nights and weekends. 

For some reason, we opt for old age too soon and then feel foolish and regretful for quitting on neat things to do and neat money to be made.

So much to see - to help others - travel and learn and maybe invent a thing to address a concern you carried all your life - or maybe  stop saying "There oughtta be a law" and go get one made.    Making a law or improving regulations in your life is very rewarding  - and  it  is easier than you think. Focus and get online and see the cyber seniors doing it as I type here.

YES - it's about LIFE.    "O Raidant Dawn - welcome 2017"  May we not let it down!   

 

The Tablecloth - TrueYule loveStory

THE TABLECLOTH - true winter holiday story

The brand new pastor and his wife,  arrived in early October at Suburban Brooklyn, New York, newly assigned to their first ministry, to re-open a church  that was not in use,  very run down and needing much work.  Undaunted, they set a goal to have everything done in time to have their first service on Christmas Eve 1970. 

They worked hard, repairing pews, plastering walls,  painting, and more.  It was December 18 and they were ahead of schedule and just about finished.  Then, on December 19,  a terrible tempest - a driving rainstorm - hit the area and lasted for two days.  On the 21st, the pastor's heart sank when he saw that the roof had leaked, causing a large area of plaster about 10 feet by 8 feet to fall off the front wall of the sanctuary just behind the pulpit, beginning about head high. The pastor cleaned up the mess on the floor.  Prepared to postpone the Christmas Eve service,  he headed home.

On the way, he noticed that a local business was having a flea-market type sale for charity so he stopped in.  One of the items was a beautiful, handmade, ivory colored, crocheted tablecloth with exquisite work, fine colors and a Cross embroidered right in the center.  It was just the right size to cover up the hole in the front wall.   He bought it and headed back to the church.  By this time it had started to snow.  An older woman was running from the opposite direction,trying to catch a bus.  She missed it.  The pastor invited her to wait in the warm church for the next bus, 45 minutes later.  She sat in a pew and paid no attention to the pastor while he got a ladder, hangers, etc., to put up the tablecloth as a wall tapestry. 

The pastor could hardly believe how beautiful it looked and it covered up the entire problem area !

Then he noticed the woman walking down the center aisle.  Her face was very pale.  "Pastor," she asked, "where did you get that tablecloth?"   The pastor explained.  The woman asked him to check the lower right corner to see if the initials,  "EBG" were crocheted into it there.  They were. These were the initials of the woman, and she had made this tablecloth 35 years before, in Austria. 

The woman was stunned as the pastor told how he had just gotten the Tablecloth.  The woman explained that before the war, she and her husband were well-to-do people in Austria.  When the Nazis came, she was forced to leave.  Her husband was going to follow her the next week. She was captured, sent to prison and never saw her husband or her home again!

The pastor wanted to give her the tablecloth;  but she made the pastor keep it for the church.

To thank her for her beautiful gift,  the pastor insisted on driving her home,  that was the least he could do.  She lived on the other side of Staten Island and was only in Brooklyn for the day for a house-cleaning job.  He then hurried back to prepare for the evening's duties. 

What a wonderful service they had on Christmas Eve!  The church was almost full.  The music and the spirit were great!  At the end of the service, the pastor and his wife greeted everyone at the door and many said that they would return.  But one older man, whom the pastor recognized from the neighborhood, continued to sit in one of the pews and stare, and the pastor wondered why he wasn't leaving.  The man asked him where he got the tablecloth on the front wall, because it was identical to one that his wife had made years ago, when they lived in Austria before the war and how could there be two tablecloths so much alike?

He told the pastor how the Nazis came, how he forced his wife to flee for her safety, and he was supposed to follow her, but he was arrested and put in a prison.  He never saw his wife or his home again all the 35 years in between. 

The pastor asked him if he would allow him to take him for a little ride. They drove to Staten Island and to the same house where the pastor had taken the woman three days earlier.  He helped the man climb the three flights of stairs to the woman's apartment, knocked on the door and witnessed the greatest Christmas reunion he could ever imagine! 

A True Story - submitted by Pastor Rob Reid

New Years Eve Times Square 1966

Freezing - just freezing - and we were delighted!   In a few hours,  it would be 1966,  temperatures around 30F,  with significant wind chill that year, made no impression on us !

He and I  were in love!   We laughed, thrilled with  any excuse to hug close.    And so the weather was our friend, as we emerged from the parking garage.   The weather only added to the excitement of the evening and the thrill of being at New Year's Eve Headquarters at Times Square in  New York City !  

We'd earned the break!   Both of us had been intent on winning our gold stars all along.   Now, his first college done, and with the promise that he'd be working to get rid of the killer chemical, Agent Orange in Viet Nam, his military duty began:  Basic Training almost finished for him and on to special chemical training, then Officers Candidate School, after the holiday leave.    And for me, younger, a student break-time from college,  and job and happy to be hosting MY soldier at my parents home, most welcome by all.    Christmas in Connecticut was the best and now Times Square in our best city evening attire.   Yes!

So far, it had been a  happy holiday in spite of the dangers ahead.  Whatever it was, we knew it was our time, our game and we'd win thru anything on Earth or in Heaven.  We really believed that !   I still feel that the right kind of love, one that feeds the life lights, and improves the drive for life, always makes the right kind of difference.  There was nothing witheld in love and commitment and best integrity and now this glamorous night was ours! 

Tearing along the pavement, the glow now warming us as we actualized our plan.  There would be dinner, champagne and music and then back on the run, to the best spot for the view in Times Square, for the landing of the New Year's Ball !  

1966 ,   we are here and we are ready!   It may be war out there, but to us, it's about life !  

We did not plan on the cold and so we talked more and walked a bit faster than the dreamy tourist-y  stroll we had in mind!   At one point he joked about our pace being brisk and we began to sing "We're off to see the Wizard"  together, and even did the skipping dance for a few seconds,  to dramatize our pace - then more laughter.    Later in our marriage, "off to see the Wizard" became our code for any need for extra caution or push or special consultation - and would give us a winning smile in a difficult moment. 

That night - it evolved as symbolic in many ways:  Yes it was cold and dark - chilling to the bone if not dealt with -  and again we felt fully confident that we'd win through because the dark and cold were broken by  the lights of love, inspiration, action, friends and more !   And, though we were of the age to focus on perfect self-reliance, there were also  our saints and angels.  

We gazed intently at one another and kept up the brisk pace, with added powers and understanding.  Exhilarating !  I was so glad to be there and with HIM and no one else!  When you are in love, with a person, idea or life in general - challenge is an opportunity !

Navigating the density of the crowd, alone, was quite the thing to experience "for real" !   It was nothing like the like the television coverage of the night - nothing like the view from a warm sofa, as a home audience.  

They say everyone should visit Times Square at New Years Eve once in their lifetime.   Ohhhh, YES!  

The air, the night, the sounds and the crowd!  We immersed - we were one with the ocean of souls.    All sorts of people in the full range of dress:  casual , formal and costumes - the big googly glasses were fairly innovative that year, and so many having fun with the "Merch" of the evening!   We only wanted US, but I think we bought something for souvenir.  

(Will this story GET there?   I am doing it to you  it on purpose, gentle readers...waiting is maddening, no? )

It was still early and ducking in and out of the crowd,  we danced along now, on with our evening.

En route to our restaurant, we encountered a man lying against a building wall, possibly not sober, probably a homeless man, judging by his soiled, inadequate clothing and unshaven looks. Dressed to the nines, my husband-to-be and myself were quite the contrast and paused, ready to help him to warmth and some cash.  For a number of reasons, social consciousness  had recently been  brought to life and was growing.   And so we stopped and assessed and thought what to do.   This was the prosperous sixties - most out-of-towners never saw anyone so afflicted.  We were sad and wanted to help, but a NYPD policeman approached to take over, and so we went on, reassured and at peace about it.   

Dinner was grand !  Music, warm hearth, champagne and hot food, were twice as fine, after the chilly outdoor trek getting there!   The place was chosen by him for their famous Prime Rib, his favorite.   Of course, Sole Chemise en Blouse for the lady - the rule at that time.  

Pleased.    We relaxed and glowed and yet, we were ready to move on, when it was time,  because it was nearing THAT time -  the suspense was as delicious as the meal !

Nearing midnight December 31, 1965 !

Now truly on the quest,  we dashed once more, toward the Square and "The Moment"   -   the noise was WONDERFUL!  and then the countdown:

 "Ten !   Nine !    Eight !   Seven !   Six !   Five !   Four !   Thuuureee !   ahhhh-Two !   OOOOOONE !!!! .... HAPPPPPY NEW YEAR !!!!  "

Jubilation!    

All these years later and such good years -

and widowed and recovered long ago, it remains a treasure to remember our own Times Square New Year Kiss!  

A new year and at Times Square with the longed-for Handsome Prince at my side and I at his!   

A new year and feeling empowered for it!

We kissed again!  And many around us doing the same!

A new year,  not without challenge but without real fear!  

I don't even remember the trip home - we held on to that moment and cherished it along till it eventually faded on its own. That was one lifesaver we would never bite!  

It was a grand way to begin a grand year and a few months later we were officially engaged and that Christmas, married!  Feeling we'd done it right, so far, and happy to do more of the same forever together!

May it be so for you, now and always!

Happy New Year!

Elle